Yellowrose, Have you ever seen the movie Pure Country with George Strait? There is a line in it where Ernest,the dad says to him, "The funny thing about that little white speck on the top of chicken shitt. That little white speck is chicken shitt too."
One of the things you do not hear around these parts a lot is sometimes we deserve better. Your attitude sounds good and I am truly hoping that is a sign that you have a solid boundary for how much you will tolerate. The first time we do this we are new to it and scared and afraid of being alone, and feeling all the guilt of what has occurred. This blinds us to some realities. In fact if I were a betting man I would bet that you have looked back once or twice and wondered why you put up with so much crap the first time.
Your answer to that will probably center around your child, which I have the utmost respect for. Now lets take that out of the equation and talk about what YOU deserve. Better than this! If he can't put on his big boy pants and quit striving for the fantasy of greener pastures existing that are better then what he has with you, then do not let the door hit you in the asss on the way out dude.
Let me tell you something else, "keeping his options open", that is a line for single men. He needs to pick an option and be a man and just do what he is going to do. Your marriage is not a convenience until his next urge comes around. It takes a heart of gold and a stomach made of steel to make it through this once. Asking you to swallow your pride and wait to see what he decides again is simply heartless. A man who is given the once in a lifetime gift of forgiveness from a woman he is supposed to love that then turns and tries to double dip fate, thats just a man who has no appreciation for the gift that he has received.
I respect the hell out of you Yellow, love that you had the courage to come on back here and share whats up. Now I am really really hoping that through the firestorm that you survived the first time you have developed a strong enough self image to not tolerate too much here. The way you did things the first time was based on a fool me once situation, I believe there is a great quote out there regarding the whole fool me twice philosophy! Glad to see you yellow, sorry for the suck asss reason why.
