Well i have so much to say. After that last posting, i found out she wasnt at my parents as she got picked up by the police for failing to appear for her court date for her theft charges.
She was only held 24 hrs as she was attending her grandmothers funeral when she should have been in court, so they understood why she forgot and let her out.
The really good point about this is at first she was rude to me and she told me she had a really bad weekend and i could ask my people to find out why. I told her no, that i didnt need to do that as i was asking her. She softened and told me everything that had happened. I then asked her when her court date for her driving under a suspended license was. She told me and i asked her how she was getting there and she said she didnt know. So i offered to take her, and she accepted.
Last wednesday, I picked her and our mutual friends up and brought them out to the house for dinner. W was taking bus over to friends place. I parked my company car right out front of there house waiting for her to get there. she shows up with OM who is dropping her off. We witness some raised voices and she slams the car door as she gets out. None of us say anything. When i drop our friends off and then head to drop her off after dinner, OM phoned our friends to find out if she was there, as she hadnt called him and told him what she was doing. When our friend said she was on her way home and i was dropping her off, her said F'ing great and hung up the phone.
That friday for her court I showed up to her place an hour before the time with a coffee in hand and she seemed genuinly happy to see me. I took her to court, i asked to speak to the crown before appearing before the judge and got her a $500 fine and a 6 month suspension instead of the minimum 1 yr and $1000. So i looked like a hero there!
On the way home, she told me her she got her first pay cheque but they didnt direct deposit it. I offered to cash it for her in my account as hers gets held for 7 business days. So she had money for her weekend visit with the kids, which she had at my parents home and she stayed from friday to sunday, my parents looked after the kids while she worked sunday and she came right back there after work.
I asked her why i took her to court, why i was cashing her pay cheque? why wasnt OM taking care of these issues? Her response was, "I dont know and they dont discuss money or her issues." nice relationship.
Her phone died saturday afternoon, and she forgot her charger, so she couldnt talk to OM. Well she got home Sunday night and charged it and went to work on Monday leaving it at home. When she got home Monday night she sent me a text asking me to make a list of all phone numbers for the kids and family, as strangely all texts, msgs and her address book had been erased from her phone!
I told her someone had to have erased the msg or the sim card went bad, but if that had happened she wouldnt be able to use it now. I left it at that, but it seems awefully strange that the OM is very controlling and now her phone is erased.
Now comes the real funny part, i was at our mutual friends and they are friends with OM's ex girlfriend, and she was there. OM got her hooked on drugs and she became dependant on getting them from him and ended up having an affair with him. She only got out when her dad walked in the door, took her and admitted her to the hospital. She said he was very controlling, never wanted her to work and never gave her any money, always did all the shopping etc. and only left her with smokes and drugs to get through the day. So i got a very good insight into the OM.
So i am picking up w tomorrow to bring her out for her visit with the kids. I went out of my way and bought her a new cell phone today and a pocket calendar so she can keep track of her work hours. Maybe this was too much, but this phone can be locked so no one can erase any data without the password.
Now as per me, I am doing well, I went out with my friends and the women from the gym, had a great meal and danced til 2am. It was fun, and thats how i left it. She has asked me to a movie next week. I told her that right now i am just looking to be friends and not get romantically involved with anyone. She said that was great and she wants to hang out and get to know me. She knows that i am separated from my wife and not divorced and she is fine with just being my friend.
On a personal level, I am doing great, the stress decrease with the new job is much easier on me, and i get to spend a lot more time at home with my kids. I am almost off of my anxiety meds and should be with in the month.
I am happy with myself, i have disconnected from my wife. I dont contact her at all unless its about the kids. We are communicating, and she is showing genuine interest in their day to day lives. I find something positive about every day and it helps keep me happy. So i am doing very well and i am enjoying my life.
So there is my long update. I will try to catch up on others stories.
