1. You seem pretty calm, and quite knowledgable about the right tactics. But I wonder if I can help change your thinking slightly so that you can be even calmer. I was struck by 5 words you said twice in your list of 180's.
Not one time have I.....
When put that way, those words have a very defensive and almost argumentative ring to them. And I get why...you have battled the yelling demons all your life with your dad, and then with your marriage. The yelling problem has been amplified now that you know that you have to stop it to improve your marriage and your relationship with your kids. If I had to guess, you are telling yourself each and every day that you are doing better with things, almost to the point where you are sometimes really struggling to convince yourself that this is the truth. Those words kind of, and I only mean kind of, suggest that your confidence is lacking that 180's #1 and #2 above are going to stick.
And that's where I think you might be able to calm yourself even more. You're doing great with 180's #1 and #2! But maybe you should look at it as: "I haven't yelled at my kids when we've been out for a long time. I hope to be able to talk things out and avoid losing my temper from hereon." OR Kids seem to be able to have fun more now that
M-34 XW-32 D-7 Found OM's presence 4/09 Separated 12/09 Divorced 8/10 GREAT relationship as coparents since 8/10
