Here we go again!

[bethann]

I posted early on the 30th and then later that evening had an arguement with H. We are stuck financially, fighting constantly over money. Anyhow, he showed up late on the 30th, asking if he could talk. He wants $30,000 from me based on what he thinks he would get if we sold the house and division of assets etc. It's a long, drawn out story, but based on what he owes me (division of debt) and a $20,000 loan from my parents, I figure I will end up owing him around $3000. He cannot wrap his mind around this, nor will I let go. I have 5 kids to raise and contrary to what he thinks, I do not have $30,000 lying around the house!!

He is very unhappy right now, and I think that he believes that this money will suddenly make him happy. Trust me if I had it, I'd give it to him, but I don't.

So, he shows up on Sunday, asking to talk and immediately tells me that he's been thinking and he's not willing to pay me or my parents back the money he owes. Then, he writes me the child support cheque for half of what it's supposed to me and tells me that's what he thinks he owes for the month. It's not like it's a number we agreed upon, it's straight black and white, you punch in income and the number of children and they give you a number -- but he says he's not paying it this month. So, I backslide. I say everything I'm not supposed to -- that I don't know how he sleeps at night and that I don't know how he can call himself a "dad" when he doesn't do anything with his kids and now won't even contribute financially what he's supposed to. I am furious.

So, on Monday, I go back to my lawyer's office and officially sign papers to get legally separated. This is NOT what I want, but I cannot afford this house, van, utilities, groceries etc. etc. to take care of these 5 kids without some help. He'll probably receive his letter by the end of the week.

I see this getting really ugly soon!! How can I DB and go through a legal battle at the same time?? If I could afford this on my own I would, but I can't.

Any ideas, anyone else have a similar situation???