this is a good lesson for me to hear right now, as I'm having a hard time and ended up in a OR talk again that no doubt made me seem weak. Thank you all for these posts. Like you all, I know this is true, but sometimes fail anyway. Wives want men who are strong and confident. They want men who desperately want them, but don't NEED them. Sometimes I put myself is situations that wear me down and make me crazy - like "over giving" in the hope of pleasing my W so she will, well, love me - just makes me tired, grumpy, and needy. And it never, never, never works. It is not what she needs. And it makes the OM seem like a pretty good alternative.
I've been into taoist ideas lately. Like, it is better to not try too hard. Or the best way to get something is to let it go, then have it come to you. Well, taoist texts are pretty vague so maybe they mean whatever you want or need them to mean. And it's probably much like other philosophies (some one else today was talking about the serenity prayer). Maybe it's just not healthy to love too much or too deeply because despite what our spouses might say it's not really what they want from us. Could that be the draw of the OM? That he has a full, independent life (even his own W) and isn't so wrapped up in my W. hmmm.....now I'm just thinking out loud. Anyway, thank you gentlemen.
