A Lovestruck Romeo Singing the Streets in Serenade

[Denver_2010]

I think you got your head in the right place in a very short time.

It took me much longer to get there.

Thanks for keeping up with my sitch Grit! I really appreciate it. I don't know if you are right about my head being in the right place though. I feel that some days it is, and others it is not.

I know what I want, I know why I want it, and I know what I need to do for myself to give me a chance to get it. What I can't figure out completely is what I am going to do if I fail in getting it.

You have warned me about having expectations in the past. You are right. I know that you are. But how can I NOT have expectations when I see positive progress? It was easier to avoid expectations when my W was having nothing to do with me. It was easier to be more detached when my W was having nothing to do with me.

I just don't know how we're suppose to DB for the purpose of saving M, but also DB for the purpose of our own emotional survival and our own happiness.

Now when interacting with W I see she is questioning your every move.

She doesn't trust your changes and won't unless they are consistent.

I know that she does not. The personal changes that I have experienced and worked on since W left me HAVE BEEN for me and, like I told IC last night, I plan to be very aware of, and avoid at all costs, slipping back into my bad habits and bad behaviors. I don't want to be the person I was before.

I know that i need to continue to be consistent with these changes and HOPEFULLY, my W will come to believe that that they are for real and that they are permanent.

You are still pushing her. With the movie thing.

My advice if you really want to see SS then ask her if you can take him for a couple of hours.

Also I think 2step is right you are too available to her.

They will cake eat at every opportunity.

I saw, or rather I felt, an opening with W this weekend and I jumped for it. Maybe it did put a little pressure on her, but I'm not so sure. While she did tell me that she needed to think about it before agreeing, I found it interesting that she had already looked up times that the movie was playing before she went from "i'm not sure... I feel weird" to agreeing to going with me. I think that she had already decided that she DID want to go.

Or at least I hope that my read on that is correct.

I do agree with you, 2Step, MJ, and FOBD that I may be becoming too available to her. It is just very difficult to say 'no' to an opportunity to spend time with W.

You are doing great man. Make sure your actions are the words you speak.

Thanks again Grit. They will be.