I enjoy being at home with my kids...sure it's stressful and it's draining but it's also a hell of a lot of fun. I get to do things with my kids that moms who choose to work so that they can have that outside life don't...I am the one they call for first thing in the morning and when they go to bed..I am the one who puts bandaids on their boo boo's..I am the one who watched them take their first steps and utter their first words..I am the one who is their parent...there is no way in hell I would ever give that priveledge to some other person and pay them for it to boot.
that said,
I don't resent my h for not being mr.mom. I do however resent the fact that he doesn't make the time for US as a couple or for us as a family all that often...it's always "next week" or "next month" or "the winters comming" or "let me get past this storm" etc.
Sure the fact that I am at home all day with them may make me a bit more interested in feeling closer to him, however I can assure you that my being home as apposed to being in some work environment is not the problem here...If I were out in the work world..I would be exposed to not just other women (wich tell stories of what their h's do for them...like giving them a surprize day off at the spa..me I have a gift cert from last year...h told me to wait to use...h's who take them out to dinner or tell them jokes etc) and let's not forget there are men out in that world..men who may like to converse with me or heck notice me..would that be productive for my marriage? I don't think so.
as far as volunteering..for those of you who don't bother to read all of what ll says here I'll say it again...I am volunteering as an emt for my town...I've just finneshed my emt course wich was 2 nights a week and now am taking a hazmat course wich is 2 nights a week. The kids are little in a few short years they will both be in school at least part of the day and at that time I will seek some employment prefereably within the school system so that there is someone to come home to during the summer. MY CHOICE and I don't regret it at all...I'm greatful for the opportunity to stay home!
it would be nice if I had a friend/lover in the off time though..but h just wants the life of go to work, watch football, put kids to bed, watch tv and fall asleep on the couch or maybe fall asleep in the bed on a good night.
so to be clear...I do not resent my children, I do not resent being home with them I do however resent h for not being the h he can be out of pure lax (in other words...I feel taken for grantide by h...that he doens't feel it neccessary to put forth all that much effort cuase I'm obviously a sucker and aint going anywhere)
