LL, You obviously still have some feeling for this man. You sound angry in your posts and VERY frustrated. I know how it feels to tell them what you want just to have it ignored or worse yet, turned against you. Have you thought about writing him a long letter explaining all you feel and your hopes for your future? It's easier than trying to have a conversation, and you can lay it all out on the table and he doesn't have to respond if he doesn't want to, but at least he'll know how you feel. You have alot pent up inside of you. I guess you can stay for the kids, but wouldn't it be better to stay for the kids and for YOURSELF? It seems in your case baby steps could make a huge difference. I've said it before, but I'm a firm believer that the only thing you can do to change your H is to change yourself. You have to have the desire to save you M though because, it's hard enough to do when you DO have that desire. Treat him like you want to be treated. I KNOW you don't think it will make a difference, but I think it will. Maybe not right away, but if your consistent I think he will respond. If your staying in the M for whatever reason, you might as well fight to make it better. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain at this point. Come on LL, go for it! Rachael
