BND - tough ride, but feeling good. Email me? [I am not RCR!! btw]
Yeah, I think she knows that!
Yellowrose,
I'm so sorry you find yourself here again. Yours was a situation that concerned me due to the quick return. You and Butterflymom were the early return situations and I did not feel her situation was MLC so was less concerned.
But your MLCer did go fully into the tunnel and process. Had he been yanked out before or barely into processing I would be concerned that he would go back in and his crisis might very well be worse.
But that did not happen. Instead you learned to detach and the two of you worked together in rebuilding. That did a lot and he now feels safer with you. It makes his remaining issues easier to deal with because of that greater feeling of security. But as you are seeing, it does not mean he is not frightened.
Many former LBSs are so scared of a return to MLC that they may become kick’em to the curbers when unresolved MLC type issues resurface. The irony is that having learned how to detach, focus on Self and deal with an MLCer, they are better equipped. They don’t have to start from the beginning puddle of fear and despair. There may be an initial shock, but given your experience you should bounce more quickly. It seems you bounced immediately because though it is disturbing you say you feel calm. See, you’re already where you need to be.
