On the one hand, you are a smart, sensitive, introspective guy who seems to IDENTIFY the fact that you need to look out for your own interests, and draw your personal boundaries in your interactions with a sometimes-unpleasant wife, but I still feel you struggling to do so.
Any luck initiating/adding some affection to the mix?
Starsky
Starsky, I cant' argue with you about your impressions--they are what they are, and serve as useful feedback to me. What I post and share are my struggles, so that is what you see. I feel like I'm getting better at expressing my needs, and taking action to get them met. I don't feel like the man in the story who moved a rock up a hill, only to have to do it again. I feel like I'm getting more skilled, and mentally stronger.
I think what it is that certain skills take time to develop, and it takes time to replace old habits with new ones. You're reminding me that I'm not there yet, and need to keep reading, and posting, and practicing.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
