Why does sex hurt? I'd start by trying to figure that part out and fix it if you can. That's the low-hanging fruit.
I'm also curious--you say you're the LD partner and you haven't had sex for 6 months. Has it been six months since you even wanted to have sex, or six months since you and your husband were able to get that far for whatever reason? I've been told so many times that LD spouses often want more sex than they're having in a sex-starved marriage, but that was hard to believe for a long time.
