A Lovestruck Romeo Singing the Streets in Serenade

[Denver_2010]

Journal/update

1/28/11

My W called me at about 4 this afternoon. She was pleasant. She called bc I had told her a couple of nights ago that I would spend time with SS on Saturday night so he wouldn't have to stay at his grandpa's (FIL) house 2 nights in a row. W has singing gigs both tonight (Friday) and tomorrow night (Sat). SS still has pink eye, W's mom is out of town, and FIL always goes to church on Friday nights. So FIL was concerned about taking SS to church since he is still contagious.

Anyway, W asked me if I'd switch nights with FIL and spend time with SS at our home tonight. I had previously made plans to meet a friend for happy hour drinks at 5:30 and she needed to be at her gig by 8.

I agreed and told her that I would be happy to spend the evening with SS and that I would still take him to a movie tomorrow night. I told her that I was meeting the friend for drinks and asked if she would "meet me" downtown at around 7:30 to drop SS off.

She asked me who I was meeting. I told her that it was a friend who was having a difficult time right now. W asked what that meant, and I told her that it was a long story that I'd have to tell her another time. She asked me where I was meeting my friend and I told her. I again asked her where she wanted to meet. W responded by saying "you don't want me to show up where you are meeting your friend?" I explained that I was just offering to meet her somewhere closer to where her gig is so that it would be easier. She said that she preferred dropping him off at the restaurant that I was going to be at. I agreed.

W called my cell at about out 7:45 and said that she was outside the restaurant and couldn't find a parking spot. I went out and met W and SS. W was in her car. I told her that my friend had wanted to meet her. She responded by saying again that there wasn't any parking (which there wasn't any close by) and that she was running late. But I got the impression that she had intended on coming in when she first got there.

Took SS home. W texted me a little later.

W: "Are you guys home? Don't forget SS's eyedrops and wash your hands often! Going on soon."

Me: "We just got here and got changed. All is great!!! Have a good show! And have fun..."

W: "Thx"

I didn't respond.

----------

Feeling a bit blue right now. I feel that W is drawing closer to me, but I also feel very uncertain. And I kind of feel that maybe I should not have been so available tonight to watch SS. I don't know. Kind of feel a bit like a doormat. I also can't help but wonder if OM is at her show while I'm watching SS.

I don't even know what the status is with OM, and I have no reason to believe that he will be there, but I would definitely feel taken advantage of if my imagination turned out to be true. I guess that I will probably never know.

I also feel a little blue bc I am having a problem being patient right now. Because I feel her drawing closer, I want reconciliation to happen NOW. I don't want to wait and be patient anymore.

As I was watching a movie with SS, I let my mind drift. I imagined W calling later tonight and her somehow ending up coming to our house and spending the night in our bed with me. I know that this won't happen, but I can't tell you how happy that would make me.

I know that this is a boring update. Sorry. I just want to document everything so that someday I can look back on it all as a reminder.

Take care everyone. Thanks for reading!

BITS
Denver