Your feelings are your feelings. And that is ok. But are you waiting for them to change? no...more like waiting til they are definite in one direction or the other One of these days you are going to actually take steps to make your life better. hmmmm? have become an emt and will be volunteering with the town, son is in pre-school now and dd may go next year giving me a bit more me time to perhaps go to the gym and not fear getting a call back to the kids room for tears. eventually I may join a payed ambulance service (depending on how much I enjoy the volunteer bit) eventually I will either futher my education with one degree or another (I already have a bs) I make plans with friends and don't bother to check with h first anymore.. What are you afraid of? there could be many answers to that question but I suppose you mean in relation to my marriage? well I fear moving beyond h (not being able to share with him things in my life becuase "he just wouldn't understand" or meeting someone that I am more compatable with or not and nothing getting better with the r despite the fact that my life once again gets full and just peacefully co-exhisting in a m is not what I want.
