Seeking

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I just feel an overwhelming sense of loss to see how 28 years of M can be disposed of so easily and without a glance back. I still have a hard time wrapping my head around it.

SA, I am so sorry that you are feeling this ^^^^ way. IMO, try not to look at it as 28 years of M disposed of rather look at it as 28 years of good times, bad times and growth. You and your H have a lot of history together that should not and will not just be disposed of. Nothing can take away the good times. Cherish them for what they were.

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Right now it's time to shift gears and get on with the business side of the D. H will not be happy with about which I'm going to do.

Yes…at this point you must look at it as a business transaction. IMO, always operate with dignity, class and respect. Remember no one wins here! No one. Determine what YOU want for YOU and then stay focused on that – everything else is just par for course. Stay true to YOU at all times. And please….do not let guilt drive any of your choices.

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Right now, H seems to be out for himself as the D settlement papers indicate.

He can be all for himself…in the end the two attnys will sort it out and/or a judge. Do not be afraid SA! Do not be afraid to stand for what YOU believe in…just make sure that you are not trying to do something with the intent to get him to “understand or face his demons”.

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I agree that I'll be happy without him, but I'll always carry him in my heart. He can't take that away from me.

SA….take the time to absorb and feel all of this. Do not rush it. The legal process can be very frustrating. Make sure that you pick a L that will work for YOU and your interest. You also want to make sure that the L is available to you. I would also be very careful about how much of a retainer you provide. I have found that the more or a retainer you give the more you get charged.

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If you haven't already, please read the book 'From abandonment to healing'

I second this ^^^^ a great book. Some of what is covered in this book is covered in the DR / DB books but I did find the book to be an eye opener.

Sending you hugs ((((SA))))

God Bless,
Eric


"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter".
"Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!"
"Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans