second verse same as the first

[MichelleLT]

I almost asked her if I could come down for few days to have some lunch or dinner.

No no no!!!!!

W "I did. I just laid there. It's just been a bad week"

M "Would you like for me to call you in the morning when I get up. Just to say Hi and then I'll go"

W "NO. I don't want anything from you. I don't want to depend on you. I can do this on my own"

The proper response was validation, not fix-it, as you seem to have figured out.

You can't make it all better.

You can't short-circuit the process.

She has to go through her process alone. Just like you are going through your process alone. That way you are two whole functioning adults when you try and build a new relationship.

Even if she did decide to come back, she would forever regret giving up on herself, giving up her fight to find herself and claim her independence. She would resent you for it FOREVER. You can't rush her.

Time is on your side. Take a deep breath and take care of yourself. Kick that cold and get some gym time in. Spend time with your D. Give her time and space.