I should also add....that I did tear up when I apologized to H. He did notice this too...we were standing really close to each other. I also recall, when he kissed me on the cheek...I said, in a nervous laugh...did you just kiss me?? He responded yep. (Ummm that was real dumb of me!)
I feel so stupid...why didnt I just say bye and get in the dang suv!?!
Now, I'm back to just waiting on him to make the next move.....which clearly he is running for the hills about now...
PLEAE yall...I need your feedback....good, bad & ugly!
Praying for us all always, Dixie
Dixie - I really don't think that this sounds all that bad. Maybe a little backslide when you let yourself get emotional and mentioned the R, but otherwise, I think that you handled well. Yes, he still has control, but NOT as much. And it is going to take more time and effort on your part to wrest more of that control to your side.
I know that you've heard this over and over, but you need to go dark now and GAL. Remember, you can't make him change his feelings. It is only going to happen if he begins to miss you and begins to think that he might be losing you. This will not happen if you are contacting him. Go dark and GAL for a month... see what happens. Don't let your FEAR of what he is doing and/or thinking guide and control your actions.
I like Lost's idea of adopting a puppy a lot!! This can also help with GAL. You start taking the dog out for your marathon walks, or take up hiking, take him/her to a dog park where you may meet new people, etc. Great idea. You should consider it.
Hang in there! YOu are doing great!
BITS Denver
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
