I was on Cloud 9 today until I just got a phone call from my son's school saying his PE teacher had just walked him in to the office to have a discussion about his frequent (translation: almost daily) tardies.
There my son unloaded to the Dean that some were his fault, some were his sisters' fault, and that sometimes our "arguing" affects him.
Wow .... want to talk about how R problems and A can have such devastating effects on kids! Why didn't H think about this before he went off to play with OW?
The kids don't know about the A. They only know that mom & dad are having problems that they are trying to work out. When asked if we would divorce, we were honest and said that was a possibility, but not one we were considering right now or for a very long time. I just didn't want to set them up assuring them everything was OK and then yank the rug out from under them and be accused of lying to them. We assured them that all mommies and daddies have problems and sometimes it just takes longer to work out some problems.
We don't talk in front of them. We don't argue in front of them. We talk late at night after they are asleep with the bedroom door shut in low voices. Pretty hard to be angry and "yell" when you can't raise your voice above a whisper.
But, they saw their mom turn into a zombie for July and August. I know they can sense the stress. Even when I think things are going better between my H and I, I guess they don't get that impression. Suprisingly, they said they did not feel any improvements... To them we are still fighting.
Why do my kids need to pay for the faults of adults? It's not fair for them!
I have to sign off now because I can't see the keys through my tears.
VelvetPear
With time and patience, the mulberry leaf becomes a silk gown.
~Chinese Proverb~
