I WILL Attain my Goals - Personal and M

[Denver_2010]

Thanks BITS for all of the concern! My previous post today where I said that I was fired up was actually bc I am more determined than ever! Nothing bad. So here is my update. I'm sorry it is so long...

Journal/Update:

1/24/11
NO CONTACT

1/25/11

I didn't hear from W all day... no surprise really. I was just hanging out at home, posting here, and playing with the dogs last night not really expecting much.

Then, at 10:30 p.m. W initiates text conversation out of the blue about something that just wasn't something that she needed to contact me about. For context, W and I are still on same cell phone plan and have the exact same cell phone.

W: "I just discovered that if you hold down the bottom left button on your phone and press the space bar, it will scroll up quickly if you accidentally hit something that makes your messages jump WAY back in the past"

Me: "LOL... We've owned these phones for how long? And neither of us knew that all this time. Pretty funny. Thx for letting me know. That is soooo frustrating!"

W: "I hate my phone. Its broken and freezes up. Have credit for new one, but no time to buy. SS is annoying me and I should be asleep."

Me: "How do you have credit for a new one? Do I? I hate my phone too."

W: "I don't know. After a certain amount of time they will give you credit for a phone or to apply to a bill I think. Its a scam to get you to renew the contract."

Me: "Did u know verizon will soon offer the iphone? And I hear that the droid is great too."

W: "I'd like the iphone. Especially since I'm a mac girl now."

Me: "Ha!! Yeah, me too! ... I mean I would like the iphone... not mac girl ;)"

W: "I better crash now. Gotta be up at 5. SS is still jackin around... and to top it off, he discovered my [sex toy] tonight while snooping. I could kill him! Ahhh!!"

Me: "Yikes... I don't know what to say bout that. Guess let me know if u need me to talk to him about it. Not sure I'd know what to say though."

W: "Uhhh how about... some sh!t you don't want to know about kid Never snoop through a woman's stuff. Geez! I can't even explain that one and I' pretty open with him."

Me: "Goodnight W"

W: "Talk to you later. Night."

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So about half way through that conversation, my FIL begins texting me too. I will edit this one for brevity.

FIL: "Can you meet me for coffee tomorrow?"

Me: "can't tomorrow... 10 on Friday? You know I have to ask... bad news bout W and/or my M?"

FIL: "10 on Friday will work. And I will give you the same response I always do... of course not! I told you this weekend. Have Faith!"

Me: "Ok. I just get nervous FIL. Sorry."

FIL: "BTW, have you sent her any flowers since I suggested it?"

Me: "No... I don't think that it is a good idea. I think that it would be pressuring her. Push her farther away."

FIL: "Haven't you heard the phrase 'he who hesitates is lost?'... JUST DO IT, AND DO IT LIKE YOU MEAN IT!!!"

Me: "I was thinking maybe for valentines day but am not sure about that either."

FIL: "I've got the inside scoop man... she thinks you don't care bc you're giving her too much space... send her a flower every day, and then a dozen or more on V day... She wants to be romanced again!!! Quit thinking like a Martian... she's from Venus"

Me: "Trust me FIL, if I thought it would help, I'd send her every flower at the florist for the rest of my life. Bt I aslo know what she asked from me... space. I just feel that I need to respect her on that."

FIL: "I'm trying to tell you... if you dn't act, SOON, you're gonna lose her. See you Friday morning."

Me: "You have me very interested in what u have to say FIL!! You have to understand that I am getting the exact opposite advice from experts on the subject of M separation... On pursuing and pressuring."

FIL: "She's softening, but she thiks you don't care bc you've stopped pursuing her... ask her out to dinner and pour your heart out like you did to me weeks ago. I've heard it, but she hasn't. You need to tell her!"

Me: "I need to hear what u have heard. Trust me, I'm trying everything I can to repair my M. Oh, and btw, if I do... This won't happen again."

FIL: "10 on Friday?"

Me: "Yes"