Here we go AGAIN....

[wanda15]

I have not talked to H face to face simply because I am not ready. he is very controlling and knows exactly what buttons to push. He will only say things to me that will get him what he wants. I will fall for it and then kick myself later. I will do this on my time now. I have been trying to make him happy for 15 years. It is time that I start doing what I need to do.

H is still the same alien he was 2 weeks ago. Today he tried making me feel guilty because it is not a nice feeling to be homeless. OH PLEASE....it was his choice. I did not fall for his drama.

This is the only way I have the strength to not whine, cry, beg, or plead. I am keeping contact to the very bare minimum so I get better at DBing. Fake it til you make....

MrBond, H's act of somewhat being humbled has fooled me before. I want so bad to believe his words but I usually end up crying and alone. I am trying to safeguard my heart. He will say things I really want to hear just so he can get what he wants and then he will be gone again.

I am strongest when communication is only through texting. Eventually it will change, just not today. Thanks so much everyone for not making me feel too bad for my slide today...