Still on the border of Neverland

[Twink]

Beatrice, thank you for stopping by, and for your perspective. While I think my H has always been selfish in several ways, these last incidents don't really fit the "come closer so I can slap you" scenario. The reason is that the hurtful things he did actually preceded the positive contact. The cc charge was two days before he dropped off D's pet and I invited him to stay for dinner, and I learned of it the next day. The bp was emailed before I called him to explain the seriousness of D's struggle. That is why I believe they were done carelessly and unintentionally, not to pull away. Nevertheless, they hit me.

And don't worry, should H ever ask to come home and work on the marriage, I will say no until certain things are done, and I see actions that match words. And he will know that, even then, it will be his only chance. I will not go through this for a third time with him.

Grace, I really appreciate your sharing so much about your D. We are dealing with something similar, and when I found out how serious it was becoming, I really believed that H should at least know. Up to then, I had let D tell him what she wanted him to know, and I think I will back off to that point again. He is incapable of supporting either D, or me dealing with D, right now, so I will shoulder this parenting responsibility myself. Might have to start wearing H's old football pads to help me out LOL!

Thanks, ladies. I've pulled myself back together with everyone's support, and will proceed with my plans for me.