Newbie post What to do now

[JustStunned]

Had a good evening yesterday, spoke with S and DIL about this sitch. I have spoken with the S since the bomb but never about the sitch and the DIL has been dark. Neither of them believes I am the monster I have been portrayed as. They understand W is angry and lashing out. My D and I spoke last night also. She wants to confront and refute what W is saying to family and friends. She agreed to try and temper her approach. It is important she expresses herself, but she agreed to try and keep it non confrontational as this would only cause W to escalate her anger. Advice from DR this board and MC all seems to agree on this point. I hope D can maintain composure.

From the D I understand her contemporaries, (nieces, and nephews) believe W will eventually see she should give this relationship a chance to develop into something different. Not what we were prior to the bomb, but not D’ed either. All of the nieces and nephews close by have been born outside of marriage or grew up dealing with SIL’s D. My W and I have been surrogate M and F to all of them at one time or another. They are feeling the stress too. Reading this make my W family seem like WT. That is not true, fair, or my intention. These posts help me detach.

This rollercoaster is running level just now, but I know another steep drop is just ahead and I am trying to be dispassionate about it. Need to GAL more I will check to see if there is a local archery club near by this weekend.