As I am spilling my worries... The other thing that I am worried about is my habit of fixing things. By nature if I can help someone, especially someone I care about, I will.
Joe was stuck in Sydney with no money as he hadn't been paid and his Christmas money hadn't come through. He was getting more and more depressed there but instead of offering (which is what I ususally do) to help him out I waited till he asked me. I paid for his flight and the first couple of nights accomodation here and he found a job straight away and has already paid me back half the money. I have been in the same situation and people have helped me, however as exh used to rely on me so much to sort things out, and then threw it back in my face I am wary of helping people - or giving too much. I also don't want him to feel indebted to me or not feel manly.
On Sunday he had lost his phone charger, so I said I would lend him one and we agreed he would meet me outside my work building at 1pm to collect it. This was after we had spent the day together on Sunday. He didn't turn up and of course I tried to phone but his phone was dead. He has never let me down before - of course he could have just forgotten or any number of things. But I am unsure of what to do next - I have the feeling nothing especially when I am stressing so much. I feel like I am in the 'crazy' and I need to micro manage every situation. It isn't good! What did I do all this divorce busting for to feel this way all over again when there really isn't any need.
He couldn't be nicer to me you know, he has said lovely things, texts me when he has credit (and I have credit) and has been really affectionate. I just seem to play out scenes and scenarios in my head based on my exh experience.
