SA, thank you for your advice. It really really helps. I'm having a s*it day and am swapping from being ok. to bursting out into tears whilst doing normal chores like making a salad! WTF!
I'm having some trouble with the GAL idea. I do get it but I don't know how to do it. Before my H left 4 months ago I had everything I wanted, and more to look forward to. We were going to move house and start a family, and boy was I ready for a baby (still am). I had the freedom to do what I wanted to do, so I had hobbies, and a 'life'. My life was the life I wanted. With him. How can I replace that? I feel like at the moment, I'm going out and doing things just to be doing something, you know? To kill time. I see my friends not to be alone. I plan weekends away not to be in the house. I go to evening classes to... well, to have something to do. When will that change? How do you guys to find the strength? I'm on autopilot. I believe he's in MLC, big time, and after 4 months of questioning myself and our relationship I have come to the conclusion that I am NOT the reason for this. Therefore, I am waiting for the day that he might realize that ending our marriage will not solve HIS problems.
How do I 'wait' without waiting?
I don't want 'any' man in my life but I do miss someone. I have wonderful friends, a good job, my pre-wedding weight back (LOL!!!)... but I miss my man. I feel so silly. I heard myself thinking today (while I was in the kitchen) "BUT I THOUGHT HE LOVED MEEEEE!" ... which made me giggle.
He did love me. I just thought I could rely on him.
I guess what I'm trying to say is - I HAVE a life. I need my MAN back. Nothing can replace him. How do you guys deal with that?
And I don't mean I am nothing without a man... or him, I hope this makes sense.
