What you are saying is profound. Purify my heart. I promise you all my interactions are kind and happy. Just letting him be what he needs to be right now and not outwardly passing judgment. Inside, though, I'm definitely passing judgment. It really has got me turned around.
I'm reading a really great book about God's unconditional love and trying to emulate it. To say that I am getting it, though, not quite. I'm not angry anymore. Not like I was. But I really meant those vows I spoke. I really did. And I'm just so hurt that he didn't. I would not say that to him anymore because Michele says that's basically the kiss of death. But, I feel it. But what this book explains is that I'm in the middle of a catch-22, because it challenges me to mean those vows even when I'm hurt and to be open for reconciliation if that chance comes. I have to be ready to love him no matter what. And that's where the challenge comes for me right now.
I have a lot to learn. I guess that's why I hang out here so much.
Thanks so much for the thoughts and advice. It really means a lot to me.
