I failled horribly...

[FellOnBlackDays]

2step, Lost, Wanda, Bond, Mod and MJ,
Thanks a ton. It is a real shame to think the the largest use of the internet is for porn when a person can get this kind of help for free on the same medium. You guys are the best.

I went to dinner tonight with a male friend of mine who is a lawyer. He can't represent me because he has been friends with my W and I for over 15 years. But, he has told me that if he has to pick a side in this thing, he will remain with me. So, he has been great to have around for free legal advice and counseling.

Anyway, he and I discussed this whole thing tonight. He does have one advantage over my MC in that he has known both of us for over a decade. For many years, we used to take vacations with groups of friends and this guy would go with us. My point is that he has been around my wife and I since the beginning. After I bounced all this off of him, he believes the MC may be taking too hard of a stance on this thing. He truly is a really good friend and I respect his opinion and judgement. Here was his thoughts:

"(name), I have know you guys since you first started dating. I have crashed on your sofa after many parties. I was there at your college graduation, her college graduation, your father's funeral, your wedding, on all those trips to Florida, and far too many numerous other occasions to mention. My point is that I have watched you and (name) together from the very start and the two of you have always been the couple everybody else wanted to be. I have watched you and (name) for years and hoped that some day I could be as good together with a woman of my own as the two of you are. Your W is not a b*tch. She is not vindictive. She is not manipulative. She is not underhanded or shady. I have watched the two of you love and fight. This whole thing is completely out of character for both of you. Where am I going with this? I think pulling a "hard line" with her tomorrow after you have worked so hard to get to where you are now might be a mistake. Not to mention, right now you guys are friends as it would appear. This is important for two reasons. One reason is sincere and loving and the other is pure business. Number one, any kind of show of aggression right now might sour the good relationship you have built. If she is setting you up, oh well. You will then go to your L and you can go after "with both barrels." But if she is sincere and may be starting to waiver, a day with you might be the thing she needs to make her come to her senses. Number two, from a business stand point and considering how much you are worth versus her, I would keep this thing friendly. She doesn't have an L right now and if I were in your shoes, I would do whatever I could to keep it that way. In the end, it is your decision. But, just think about what I have said."

My friend has some wisdom in his words too. So, here I am. I have an MC that wants me to play hardball. But, the truth is that he could not pick my wife out of police line up. And, I have a friend who is also wise and educated who has loved me and my W for years saying I should play it cool. Hmm... I guess in the end I will have to do what my heart and mind decide.

Unfortunately, I am too frazzled right now to make a clear decision. I don't know why, but I cried again today. Damned car radio!!!

So, I am just going to spend some time here tonight checking on my friends and thinking this over.

I want to send out a group thanks to all of you. My forum friends, my MC and my buddies. You have all been great. But, I think I am going to sleep on it and do whatever feels right in the morning.

I do appreciate all the prayers and support. Win or lose, this will be one of the toughest weekends of my entire life. I hope I am ready...

B.I.T.S.

FOBD