harrier, No doubt your W probably didn't have that type of connection that mine did, so it could be different. Hartley wrote his needs/ her needs and runs Marriage Builders. He has excellent advice regarding Affairs. I understand your point that connections don't go away just because you don't interact with someone. I guess that is the risk you take. Honesty and Openness are essentials. She has to be able to show you that you are the one she trusts. My W couldn't tell me her feelings, she couldn't say when she was thinking of him.... All that crap builds in their head and they can't get it out even though they don't want it there. My W had her dream job. She was 32 years old making 6 figures.. Ceo of hospital... She would have quit her job... she was that committed. Everything happens for a reason though.
