I have done everything wrong....

[Grocerykartman]

Well,

Yes, you should get a 2x4, but at least you recognize that you should now. That's a step in the right direction.

Truegritter is one of the best posters on here in my opinion. He taught me with one of his posts that you can look at this separation as a gift that your wife has given you...it's the gift of time. Time to take a good look at yourself and become the person you truly want to be, the person you lost touch with over the years. Again, she did not say Divorce, so look at that as a door that she hasn't closed. So what you do have is a separation, and a chance to take that clean look at yourself. And time to do it in.

Let's talk about your text message. You realize it's not DR material, so I won't harp on that. I think the better question is: "What made you want to text her that you loved her and missed her?" You knew not to do that, but you couldn't resist. Why? What was going through your mind when you hit the send button? Take some time to ponder this, because sending the text is kind of like being the symptom, not the disease. Look at it this way, someone could hide your phone right now so you couldn't text her like that, but you'd still be in the mindframe that you'd need to. The goal is to change your mindframe so you're not tempted to pursue her.