I guess whether you follow this advice depends on what type of marriage you want to have. I'm highly skeptical of the "6 month" expiration date on most affairs but for the sake of argument let's assume that's true. Say my H was having an affiar and I patiently waited for 6 months for him to choose me (by working on myself and making me the better option). He now knows that I'm willing to put up with that. He knows he can get away with a long-term affair and I won't stop him. He knows that I won't set any boundaries, I won't confront him, I won't make his life difficult. Instead, I work harder to be the woman he wants. What on earth is to stop him from doing that again? and again? and again? What kind of marriage is left? One without honesty, without trust, without equality among the partners.
This path diminishes the betrayed spouse's self-respect and potentially confuses/hurts the children. I consider this advice to be extremely harmful for many situations.
