Someone suggest H is having a MLC....I don't know?

[Queen_of_Swords]

Ok. A synopsis as complete as I can make it right now.

H walked away from us 16 months ago.
I could sense he was unhappy and now know he's been unhappy a long time. I thought he was depressed or had something physically health related going on, so we talked about it, and with his cooperation made appointments with professionals. A few things were found physically which continue to be addressed. Essentially he is in adrenal failure ( from stress) and has some hormonal and sleep issues. What's funny is he accused me of being "controlling" and forcing him to go to these professionals even though he still sees them voluntarily on his own after he left our home. Truly I did not frog march him there, I just made the appointments at his request!

Initially, 2 months before the disappearing act, he said he was unhappy. We then did the Retrouvaille recovery weekend, and 3 weeks later, he left.

I made an emergency counselling appointment for him with his knowledge, permission and cooperation, with a cognitive therapist because he was in such emotional distress and his words indicated urgency and( to me) a suicidal mindset. Unfortunately, this therapist is divorced, a little older than we are, and was the one that told me after the third joint session my marriage was over, things would be better in 18 months, bubye. He continues to see this therapist as finances and time allows.

Now, 10 years earlier he had started a health program because his health was not good and he was chronically tired and gaining weight. This health program consisted of body building, to the point where he was participating in competitions.

This as best I can pinpoint it, was the beginning of his distancing of himself from the kids and me.
He kept ( and still keeps to the best of my knowledge) different hours. Up at 4AM ,in bed by 9PM, has a totally different diet ( eats 6 times a day). This you can imagine is difficult with a family to raise and various food likes, sensitivities and allergies.I supported his efforts and his activities, I was his cheerleader.

He did not participate much in my or the kids activities. On weekends or evenings he would be "tired", and computer game, watch movies or do paper work. This complaint has not changed nor has this pattern ( according to my kids complaints.)

He has not changed his wardrobe, he does not wear colonge, he has not changed his hair/dyed it. he has started wearing his glasses almost constantly where before it was just for computer related tasks. He does ordinary self care normally expected.

I have not set foot in his apartment since he moved there. He made it clear I was not welcome, and I have not asked since the first time. He is/ was always secretive about his cell phone /text messages/ computer.

He is not transparent or forthcoming about much. He has great difficulty expressing his feelings, which is part of the reason Retrouvailled failed for us. He is frustrated by his own inability to express how he feels, and he is highly confrontation avoidant.

He sees the kids midweek and on alternate weekends. He phones them nightly. He does not discuss anything with me of substance, it's all superficial or work related. He has very little interest in my life.

He acknowledges I am a good mother ( but nothing else apparently). Flat out told me he is not sexually attracted to me when I pointedly asked in a moment of despair and anguish.

I don't know what to think anymore. Truly confused.