DB'ing but it's a daily struggle - need support.

[habitacker]

Your welcome, but I really don't know what for. I need to thank you, this is my medicine also.

I am on here to learn, all I am doing is passing on advice I have gotten on here, and maybe share my do and dont's that have happened in my sitch.

I have said before that my sitch seems to be going nowhere, no R talk or anything like that, which is fine for now I suppose. I actually kind of feel like I am using you and others on this site. There isn't much action in my sitch so I guess I am learning from everyone else's triumphs and failures so I am ready when and if my day comes.

I should be thanking you.


About your post about your last talk with W. You said she initiated the R talk, who did most of the talking after that? I am not accusing you of anything, I just wanted to bring it up so you could take a look at it for yourself.

Remember, when we get into a R talk, we need to listen, and let them know they are being heard. The last sentence of your 3rd,4th, and 7th paragraph all ended in her telling you how she feels, did you validate that you understood her feelings to show her that you were listening.

It is hard enough for us to shut up and listen, but then we need to show them that we listened.

I am not saying I see anything you did wrong, I just want you to look at the conversation you had and make sure you are doing what you have learned. Maybe take another look at that last post MrBond made about your last talk with your W. Just as a refresher. See if you see any pursuing in your last talk, maybe with the physical affection part? You might not see pursuing in that, but does she?