I can't take this roller coaster ride!

[Denver_2010]

Thanks so much everyone!! I really needed to see these posts today. I have been crying my eyes out all day.
After several weeks of progress and dbing by h stated sunday that he again thinks things would be better if we seperated. Come to find out he is emailing his female "friend" again after he agreed at Thanksgiving to stop all contact because I felt it was inappropriate to discuss our marriage with another women. He stated she is just someone he can talk to and acts like it is not big deal!!! WTF. He is drinking all the time now and on the computer non stop. When I straight out asked him what he wanted he stated he didn't know.
The next day he was on a trip and kissed me on the cheek before he left. That night he acted like everything was fine. Had dinner with me and the kids and sat and watched tv next to me after they were in bed.
I don't know what I am going to get from him one day to the next.
What do I do at this point....keep on keeping on or are there other things I should be doing?
Tori

That's all that you can do Riley.... keep on keeping on. IMO, you need to continue working on detaching (again, the pot calling kettle black but oh well), GAL, and 180s. WE CANNOT control the actions, feelings or decisions of our S's. That is probably #1 on the list of things that all of us here need to learn. You can only control you. So try to stop worrying about what he is doing or saying. Let him alone right now and focus on your well being.

You could consider setting some boundaries re OW and drinking while he is in same home as you, but I will let others advise you here. My W and I are physically separated so I haven't been focused on learning the boundaries stuff so much. So the only thing that I feel that I can safely say about this, is that you need to be willing to back up any boundary that you do set with ACTION and/or CONSEQUENCES.

Keep posting Riley... and remember that you're not alone here.

Denver