The issue I struggle with is that I cannot have expectations. However, she gets to have them all the time - about me and the things I'm doing.
A few thoughts on that.
First, you're here, she isn't. Meaning you came here to learn new things, some of it is just 'cowboy up' if you will. It currently is not fair, but I don't know of too much in life that is fair.
You can address her expecations, you can even use the term 'unfair' but I try to avoid it, certain words can be fighting words. "I'm trying hard here, I'd like the benefit of doubt."
I don't think you're being glib. I think you know that I am still married. If I had to sum it up, I am glad for all the (censored) we went through, everything we learned, because without it, our marriage wouldn't be as amazing and strong as it is today, stronger than yesterday.
You don't appreciate something until you lose it.
If you (both) can get past the hurt and anger and appreciate the effort each of you puts in?
You'll be preaching here too.
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I mean this is a person who loved me more than anything in the world and now they are just trying to get to a point where the like me. I know my W is in that mode too -she can't understand how me, a person who loved her more than anyone else, could change like I did.
I was there too, I understand.
She says she needs patience from you, seems to be a big item for her. Its not something you can rush, force or substitue.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
