Thank you all for your hugs, care and concern. I am so lucky to have such wonderful support.
I have been deep in thought since last Thursday AM.
Here's what happened.....You all are not going to believe it!!!
H and I arrived at about 8:42 for our 9:00 hearing. We rode to the courthouse together, it's about an hours drive at that time of day. We were fine on the way, conversation was nice.
As 9:00am approached I grew increasingly edgy as I had not heard from my lawyer that morning or the day before. Finally at 9:03 I went to the deputy standing guard at the courtroom door and I announced our presence and stated that my lawyer was still not there. He offered us to sit inside, regardless, to wait.
At 9:10 he called in the judge. I stated to her that my lawyer was not there and had not checked in with me. She urged me to call her and stepped out to take a brief recess while I made the call. H went and stood back to me at the windows. The deputy watched me without taking his eyes off me.
I reached my lawyers office and the man who answered stated she was not in and had not checked in that day. He decided to let me speak to her associate. My lawyer's associate had no idea I was in court or for what reason....OMG!!!!
The associate went on to say that my lawyer was not there, had not checked in and she would try and call her. She tried and failed. MY HIGH PAID...$295.00 per Hour, A WELL RECOMMENDED SOUTHERN MAINE LAWYER WAS A NO SHOW AND HAD NO PLANS TO. THIS WAS MY FINAL HEARING. I COULD NOT BELIEVE WHAT I WAS HEARING!!! I FIRED HER ON THE SPOT. Told her assistant that they were not to do anything further for me in regards to this matter.
H was there. He knew about it and asked me the night before if I would ride with him.
I was there................OMG!!! I'd of thought I would have been a NO SHOW before my lawyer was.
The judge had my paperwork and our names were written in the schedule on the courtroom door.
SO.......My lawyer stood me up. I felt totally humiliated in front of my H and everyone else. H chose not to hire an attorney, btw.
The judge basically stated that H could assume his own decisions in front of her but that I could not because I had hired an attorney and that she was the only person legally able to address the court on my behalf. Even though I was present she would not let me speak. I told her that I had fired my attorney a few minutes earlier and she said that my attorney would have to remove herself from my case in order for me to proceed.
The case was labeled for a continuance.
My lawyer called me later in the day to apologize and I would not accept it from her.
She went on and on how neither she nor her assistant had my schedule in their court notes. She could not believe it. I had even sent them both numerous emails (she stated she has the emails) over the past 30 days and in each I had stated the date at least twice. She had not even bothered to prepare my settlement because they were both unaware it was coming up. I still fired her. IMO, she does not have my best interest in mind. She and her associate were careless with my future. I can't go forward with her and put my faith in her that she will do better. IMO, she had stuttered her way through my initial appearance on November 5th. I have to wonder if she has something personal going on that is consuming her thoughts.
SO All......I can't really believe what happened.
Knowing what has happened and looking at it like there is really no logical reason why it did. Actually, it is absurd, in a way. I am very frustrated by this turn of events.
I believe that there is a higher power at work here. I am a firm believer that things happen for a reason. H and I are not divorced and I am thinking that we are not supposed to be. This one is way to weird for there not to be some sort of divine intervention at play.
I am once again back at square one.....
Thank you all and (((((hugs)))))
Sanderika
ME48/H48MLC T 33y M 28y S16 OW 8/7/05 Bomb 8/16/05 Sep 9/05 H f'd D 10/3/08 D pp'd 1/20/09,7/24/09,12/4/09 D dismissed 2/5/10 H served me D papers again 9/4/10 D dismissed 9/26/11
I am actually dumbfounded, speechless and in awe.....
I don't know what to do next except give it space and time.
I got a letter from my attorney Saturday and she stated that she was again sorry and she filed some sort of motion for a continuance for time required to designate expert witnesses on Friday and stated to me it would give me time: "while I decide what to do next" she stated they tried to call H to see what he wanted to do and that he declined to speak to them.
I FIRED HER (through her associate on the phone in court)AND(to my attorney in the call she made to me later on Thursday). I guess I'll have to do it again, she didn't get it the first times.
Son hung out with H yesterday for MLK day (no school) and he stayed for supper last night. I asked H if they called him on Friday. He said they did and all he was asked is "How would he like to proceed?" He said he told them to call me. He asked me if they called me and I said No they did not. And they didn't, so they took it upon themselves to try and carry forward with services they no longer have any business in tending to. WTH????
During our chat over supper last night, H made light of my lawyer saying "that's some kind of lawyer you got for yourself, I hope they are not charging you for Thursday and more, you better see that they don't". That was all that was said. We dropped the subject.
I do not think OW knows anything of the situation unless she snoops in H's papers. H keeps her at arms length as well. Last February when we dismissed the case he never told her. She found out by snooping in April/May sometime.
I have options, I think time is the best choice for now. I will wait until H makes a move.
Sanderika
ME48/H48MLC T 33y M 28y S16 OW 8/7/05 Bomb 8/16/05 Sep 9/05 H f'd D 10/3/08 D pp'd 1/20/09,7/24/09,12/4/09 D dismissed 2/5/10 H served me D papers again 9/4/10 D dismissed 9/26/11
Mr. Bond suggested I reach out to you....he said our stories were very close. Maybe you could offer some help????
Me: 40 H: 39 M: 17 yrs - Together 18 1/2yrs No kids Seperated: May 18, 2006 EA/Poss PA with OW for 6 months prior to leaving. 2nd Bomb dropped: Dec. 23, 2010
Not to be rude...I read your thread....I was so worried for you though I dont know you. But, my heart went out to you...then I saw your recent update.....
Im always so hopeful..but, I got so excited that the D didnt happen! Do you think OW is falling out of favor? Is it he wants to come back? Do you think he is starting to realize that grass is greener but, ya still got a mow it too????
God Bless Ya,
Me: 40 H: 39 M: 17 yrs - Together 18 1/2yrs No kids Seperated: May 18, 2006 EA/Poss PA with OW for 6 months prior to leaving. 2nd Bomb dropped: Dec. 23, 2010
Nothing to report at the moment. H has been quiet..... a follow up email about my phone to remind me the contract is due but nothing else. He did ask D if I'd started my new job. He's been inviting D along quite a bit for various outings and after all the drama about taking D to swimming he's doing more than his share atm.
