Thanks Cold. We do seem to be in similar situations. The mind-reading and over analyzing everything is a real no-no. Never leads to anything productive in terms of mindset.
I am like you, I was a very impatient, grumpy and self centered person in the past. I will continue to do nice things because I never want to go back to being that person that I was up until 14 months ago. I am also going to wait this out and let her get over the OM. There is no way that I am going to be the one that initiates the end our family.
It is a long drawn out process that one day will come to an end. What that ending is, I don't know. She just called me at work a few minutes ok to see what was going on and to tell me that she bought me a small gift at lunch time! It wasn't much, but the fact that she actually thought of me and took the time to buy it is very positive. This is not a straight line process and I am sure that there will be lots of back and forth along the way.
I have my feelings of the situation being hopeless as well but I have moved on past the sobbing, nothing comes out anymore. I have said it on previous posts, the longer this goes on, the more I will become like her, emotionally detached from her and the relationship. Unlike her though, I will never turn my back on her or my family.
