Well, I was very pursuing. I pursued hard until I got her.
I was very romantic and affectionate.
So how do I become the man I was before M, if I am not supposed to do these things
But that's not the sum total of who you were as a man. It's sad that men stop the chase b/c usually the romance stops too. Men thinks sex takes the place of romance after M. Unfortunately, my H has not shown much romantic imagination ever since we've been M. I found it fun to think up romantic things to do, but just once, it would thrill me for him to surprise me with something.
For you, you need to focus on the other things you were before M. I bet you'll think of a few. What are some areas you've gotten kind of "don't care" attitude?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
