Do NOT use the Love Dare techniques. You have a WAW in an A! Love Dare is very pursuing and WAW in an A will run from it as fast as she can!
Quote:
as a reminder the kids are tucked in safe and that I am available for contact if she needs to talk.
Tell me something, why do you think a mother of five would need reminded that her children were in bed an safe--if they are in the care of their father? Excuses.....all excuses! This is pursuing!
Why would you tell her (again) that you are available for contact? The point is to not be available for her.
She is feeling the affect of the A being busted--but you are there to hug and comfort her. If you weren't there, she would talk to a girlfriend just as easy, b/c that is the way women are. She needs to think of you as a man, not a girlfriend. She needs to suffer the fallout of her A. She needs to realize she could lose you and her children. As long as she thinks she can mess around with OM and you'll still be available, what would be her concern?
Quote:
She came down to get ready for work crying. OM turns out was very mean via email.
That's good. But, did you comfort her when her boyfriend was mean? You need to allow her to suffer. The more she hurts due to this A, the less likely she'll do it again.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
