The hardest thing I've ever done.

[Royloveshiswife]

Resolute: The very word my wife used. Repeatedly. I still visit very easily with my wife. She has filed. She has started using her maiden name. She has a close "friend." But I won't give up.
Emotionally, I'm a wreck. When I let myself be. I just don't let it happen very often. Like I said before, I don't bottle it up, I just keep a close eye on it. Examine it and know what brought it on. She is constantly "moving on" and "trying to heal" and tells me all about it. And it hurts to hear it. But I also hear the other parts in her voice. The parts she misses and wants to keep. I just pray there is enough of those for her to miss it. And me. I'll not give up. I'm keeping my vow. I made it to God, not my wife. She hasn't the power to release me from it. And I won't ask God to release me. I ask Him to allow me to fulfill it. I ask Him to allow me to "not divorce the wife of my youth." Those are the Lords words and I pray for the blessing of it. May God bless you and give you the strength you need. Whatever you decide.