I just got back from a train show with my son. While I was gone I see my wife has bought a $2500.00 vacumn from a guy who came and displayed it at our house. Oh My God! This woman is "sick". Shopping constantly, How can I say something?
Habit, I had a similar problem with my W. We both had very good jobs and both made over 6 figures a year. However, we also owned two houses, a 19 lot development (that we completely when economy went to crap) nice vehicles...... She thought she should be able to buy whatever she wanted, I tried to control money because despite our incomes, we never really were able to save a whole lot. We never were behind but there was a constant pressure. The more we made, the more we spent....
So every time her credit card came I would always look at it, get pissed question how the hell she could spend $3500 a month? We would fight, it would turn to other problems....Very unproductive behavior... Once the bomb hit, I 180'ed. Credit card came...$3500, I said nothing. Truth was we weren't going broke so was it really that important, when we did try to reconcile, we found out that it having a weekly meeting to discuss finances, and what we needed to buy. We never fought about money again. I guess what it came down to was information and being on the same page. Our money problems were'nt about control or even spending. It was about not working together to find a solution....
I would say that with the vacuum you may have to look at it objectively.. What are the options... If you bitch about it what is it going to accomplish.... Is their a real solution.. can she even return it... Otherwise, you are just wasting your breath... MWD says 60% of the things couples fight about have no solution at all. Sometimes it's better to just let some things go? IDK, you know your finances and sitch better than anybody, so you will have to judge if this is worth the effort.
