Brief history: Wife had short-lived EA/PA over the summer. We have been married 12 years, no kids. We are both in the performing arts, EA/PA happened at summer music festival while I was not there. We had just moved, I was at home for most of the time, although I saw her for our anniversary 10 days before PA. We just flipped breadwinner situations-she is now the breadwinner while I finish my doctoral degree. She has promised to support me financially regardless.
She confessed about 3 weeks after EA/PA. She told me she had never been in love with me and was sorry we got married before she actually confessed the EA/PA.
Spent a lot of time crying, groveling, trying to pull myself together. First counselor was a disaster-she thought that we should separate so W could self-actualize and that I should consider dating.
About a month after her confession I learned they had cut each other off-though I think it was TOM who did the cutting. She mourned the whole thing in front of me.
We tried to date each other but her heart wasn't in it. I was trying not to grovel but did anyway. She finally told me she didn't want to spend money on our relationship because she didn't want me. Later that week I exposed the whole thing to her family, who has been proactive in trying to save the marriage and very supportive of both of us.
A cousin led me to DB . I read Divorce Busting already, and have a 180 plan that gets me out of our apartment more, volunteering, spending time with friends, and looking for jobs out of town.
