The problem is that they ARE still communicating. Emails and I know of one time 2 weeks ago they met for coffee.

This is what I have been debating, do I tell her that I know she is still communicating etc or do I just let it go on?

Their email exchanges are cryptic but give the impression that the EA maybe over as follows:

In one email he asks "how are you doing". In another one she added at the bottom "BTW, I am dying."