Deju vu, but new to the online forum...round 2

[mj144]

Maybe I am starting to detach a little bit? I haven't been overly anxious the last few days even though I have moved out and spent this whole week sleeping at my new place. It's been a bit lonely, but I have hardly lived alone my whole life, so it's been OK in a strange kind of way. The gal who I am renting from hasn't been around, so I truly have been alone.

The way my days have gone lately starting with this Monday is that I come to my house at 7:30 AM, the kids are dressed, fed and practically ready to leave for school. I leave around 7:55 to get them to school by the bell at 8:10. My W requested I be there at 7:30 so she could leave for work, but she hasn't come close to leaving at that time. Then I go back to the house and get on the computer a job search all day. I pick the kids up at school and bring them home and when the W gets home, I boogie to my other place. We made arrangements that 1 night, she will not come home until later when the kids are in bed, which was tonight. I will stay in the house with the kids every other weekend and she will remove herself. We just made the decision to take the kids out of after school care until I get a job to save some $. I am also trying to help out by doing some upkeep of the house too.

I am trying to keep perspective on everything for now since it will all change again when I get a job and we have to really sit down and make a schedule with the kids.

I can't tell if this is having any kind of effect on her one way or another. It may be too soon to tell.

I just get a strange feeling that the W looks at me like I am accepting the fact that she is going to D me and not looking at me as a kinder, gentler me. Thinking this way is not detaching myself, is it?