I never read up on your situation until now. I swear your W is A LOT like mine. Including the fact that my W works in mental health field like yours. It also sounds like we are at similar, but not the same stages.
Be glad you get the ILYs. Heck when I told my W, I do love you last night, I got "Thanks, I know you do." LOL.
I think the key is patience. This is VERY hard for me because I'm naturally impatient and this makes it even harder.
I know my W, like yours, harbors a lot of anger towards me and she has said repeatedly that she has to work through it.
Trust is something that has to be built up over time. Anger is something that has be dismantled over time as well. The key here...is Time. I think you can only show her that she can trust you again...by not doing what brok the trust. And not giving her anything to be angry about. (Of course, I'm guessing here)
Note, I'm good at giving advice, but crappy at taking it.
it will be nice to have someone share this journey with.
I think once the trust and anger are gone you will start to feel secure. Our MC told us this...I need to feel "safe" in this relationship like you. Safe that things are good and my W isn't going to just leave. That too will take time.
Just remember that she is working as hard as you. She needs time. You simply cannot read her mind...even though you will try.
God Speed.
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. --Jean Jacques Rousseau.
