Is the tide turning???????

[MHL]

GAG,

Absolutely no 2x4's here.....you did great!! Yeah, kinda sux that your XH was preoccupied and late but honestly he did have a pretty good reason and the really good thing here is that he let you know he was going to be later and even let you know that he was running late for that time. The other glaring positive here is the fact that he kept the date. You are important enough to him that he did not want to stand you up.

******WARNING: MISSHERLOVE WILL NOW MINDREAD MR. GAG *********

Okay a couple of observations... Mr. GAG has a GF and he has been playing TT with you for like 2 months now on a regular basis?? His GF has got to know by now that he is playing TT with someone......if she doesn't know then your XH is hiding it from her and that would be great news for you!!! Realistically.....this is probably not the case.

That leaves 2 scenarios. 1.She knows he is playing TT with his XW or 2. She knows he is playing TT in a league/someone else. In either case it does not bode well for the relationship IMO. If I were his GF, I would not want him playing TT with his XW everyweek and if he has not told her that he is playing TT with his XW and she is not inquisitive then IMO the relationship is doomed....We kinda talked about this early on, your XH even said that this GF is on the way out, if I remember correctly. Bottom line his actions reinforce he does not care about her or her feelings. (not casting your XH in a bad light, just stating the facts).

More mindreading.....His comment about "I'm supposed to be somewhere" was very purposely vague......WHY???

He really doesn't want to kill his chances with you by mentioning that he is going to do something with another woman, even though it is obvious what he has to do. He likes/respects you enough to not say that to you. Make sense???

********* MHL has stopped mindreading**************

So things did not go where you wanted them to go last night.....

SUX......welcome to the world of dating....LOL.

Yes.....dating your XH.

Grrrrrrrrrrrr. Don't think I want to play TT with XH anymore if he keeps this up.

GAG

Take a breath, don't make any rash decisions here....observe the 24 to 48 hour rule and IMO, you should let him drive the next TT date.....meaning, let him call or contact you.

I still think that you need to step out of your comfort zone and ask him out to eat or for drinks in advance. This way he can plan for it and make the time in his schedule. The perfect opportunity would be when he contacts you to schedule the next TT session.

You could call him on the phone and say....

"Mr. GAG, I would love to kick your a$$ in TT again....hahahaha so Wednesday works great for me.....seriously I do enjoy playing TT with you and spending time with you, would you like to go to dinner with me?"

That is it, do not ask him to go at a specific time, if he says yes and asks when, ask him what works for him. Or if your feeling "flirty" you could respond with, "that is great that you want to go out with me, maybe I will accept your invitation if you ask nicely...." I know we covered this already but it is worth mentioning again.........

I would be interested in what Jody said to you.....I bet she said be a little forward with him......be bold......ask for what you want!!!!

While the sound system thing is a great idea and it is a reason for you guys to be together........

that is all it is.....a reason for you to be together, it is not a date. If it happens and you guys go shopping, and you drop a boat load of money on a hi fi sound system and he comes over and helps you set it up and nothing happens you are just going to come back here frustrated and a little poorer......right????

Look, let me give you a little glimpse into my world again....

I have been doing the internet dating thing....has been alot of fun.......do you know why????

Because everyone on the site is interested in dating!!!!! DUH.

When I am talking to a woman via chat, email, text or phone I am communicating with them because I am interested in a romantic relationship....I have found that sometimes this purpose gets blurred because people get afraid that the other person may be losing interest in them and they settle for "friend time" with the person they are interested in instead of "romantic time".

Stop settling for "friend time", I would hate to see you get pissed at Mr. GAG because he is following your lead.....what are you leading him to?????

This really works, the woman I am dating now has many guy friends that she has met on Match that are just friends and they constantly contact her and vey for her attention by doing her favors and other stuff. I recognized this early on and on our 3rd or 4th date I could sense that I was getting handed the "friend" card.....I flat out told her "I do not want to be your friend, I have lots of friends and I while the relationship I desire to have with you requires that we be friends, I want more."

You should have seen the look on her face....priceless!!!

I guarantee you that Mr. GAG would have the same reaction.....what do you have to lose???

If you never tell him your wants and desires and you stop playing TT with him.....what is the difference in that scenario and the one where you step out of your comfort zone and tell him that you enjoy spending time with him and want to spend more time with him in a different setting that is more romantic, and he says no and you still stop seeing him.

Outcome is the same........right??????

I like option "B"

BTW.....I am going to see that woman tonight who very clearly is not my "friend", LOL.

Cheers