"I find it odd that I wanted out for YEARS and all of a sudden, I'm faced with OM and I magically can't live without W? I am trying to reconcile that in my mind... I know I don't want to hurt my children. Do any of you out there feel the same or have the same questions in your minds?"

Yes, I do.....

My H and I had a very close R/M and we got complacent. After 20 yrs I took our M for granted. I enjoy a wonderful career and H never pursued his potential. Although very bright, he always took the easy way. Now H is in MLC and feeling like his life is a waste, he's a failure/fraud. I was bored with him. I distanced and buried myself in work....that was my A. He got OW. Yeah...it woke me up. Last MC session he said about his A, "If it wasn't for the A, we wouldn't be here fixing this. If the [OW & R] had been wonderful, I wouldn't be here."

Is it Whitaker out of Chicago (family therapist) who believes the couple unconsciously elects one to go out and have an A to stir things up?

My M sure needed a jump-start....OW is gone and we are piecing now....I sure didn't want it to happen this way, but here we are!

M 55 H 58 M 24 T 29
S 22,21, 19
Bomb 4/10
It (A) really isn't about you 11/2013
We all have work to do


The truth will set you free, but it will almost kill you first.