You are in my thoughts and prayers today and especially tomorrow. Antonia and Cas have really written some insightful posts! We are all proud of the loving example you have set for all of us and you should be proud of yourself too. Few people are tested the way that you have been over the past 5.5 years and you have shown true love in your actions. As Cas said, you deserve a "happy, peaceful, and successful future" not only for yourself, but also for your S. No one would ever think are unjustified in asking for what you and S need to provide for your futures.
Originally Posted By: dolphin_05
Your H's comment that he is not happy about divorcing says it all. Perhaps he thinks this will give him some kind of closure. After all, it's the only thing he hasn't tried yet to bring him the inner peace he obviously desires.
Cas is right. Your H is a lost soul or he would not be proceeding with this. Some people are very rigid in their thinking. Daniel Amen talks about this in his book "The Brain in Love". These people actually have altered function in the cingulate gyrus area of their brains. I'm pretty sure that my XH has this problem (it has been shown in adult children of alcoholics) and I would guess that a number of our WASs have this problem too.
Originally Posted By: AntoniaB
I also want to say I understand the not wanting to break down in front of him. You know what? You probably will. That's ok. It's expected, it happens to all of us usually, and it is your body's way of releasing your tension and anxiety. It's half biological, in fact, and if you expect it and welcome it as cathartic, you can ride that wave instead of letting it knock you off your feet.
Please don't be hard on yourself ^^^^^^^. You will probably become emotional tomorrow.......and you know what???? You SHOULD be emotional. The judge and everyone else in that courtroom tomorrow should be emotional to see the unnecessary demise of a 30+ year M. Do what YOU need to do to get through tomorrow. You are a very smart woman and you will be able to represent yourself wisely.
I pray that the judge tomorrow acts in a merciful and wise way and I pray that God gives you wisdom to say the things that you need to say tomorrow.
