Hi Scott,
Just wanted to say that I could relate to some of your SITCH. It hurts when S is involved with an X (or anyone) I know all to well. And as far as feeling ok one day, than depressed the next. That's just the way it is. I'm still dealing with emotions all over the place 3 months later.

I feel like I don't know my S too.

Seems like he wants his cake and eat it too.

I read something once about "greener grass" I am going to do my best to remember it and repeat it,

The grass might look greener on the other side of the fence, but when you cross that fence and go to that grass it will wilt beneath your feet.....and the grass that you left behind will again flourish and thrive.....that's not exactly how it went...but I am sure you get the idea. Hang in there.