I'm not that much help, but your story sounds like mine, I got the bomb 2 months ago too...the moving, they loving the new job, feeling abandoned/depressed (I didn't work, I'm a stay at home mom but also dealth with 2 deaths of close family right after the move) I'm mad too, that the first time I hear he is unhappy he jumps to the D word.
I'm glad SDFoundGirl replied, I have found I related to her story as well, and lot of great advice in her posts to others. I am doing the telephone coaching and that has been helped, especially on the days when I want to give up. H even did one session. He wasn't sure if it helped, but I saw a change in him right away. Not much more effort into the R, but he stopped being so negative and avoiding me. Another thing I have done, is gone to the tips from Wise DB's, read through that and cut and pasted a few things that I thought would help me stay on track.I printed off a paper that I keep in my DR book. I read through it for a quick pick me up. Kind of like my own "cliff notes" smile I'll keep my eye out for your posts. Hopefully I can be of more help in the future. This week was a hard one for me; questioning what I was doing and feeling discouraged that I hadn't seen much change. Funny though, just when I shed a few tears last night (in private), H did 2 things right after that surprised me and gave me some hope, even if small. Hang in there, and you've come to a great place for support and advice!

Me-36
H-37
D11 S8 S6
M9
T19
ILYNILWY 11/10
discover EA 02/11
discover EA is really PA/H moved out 03/11
H wants to go to counselling,piecing 12/11
Find out still OW(plural), I'm officially done/detached 04/12