Just wanted you to know that leaving you was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. Despite what you think/thought and how I made you feel, in my eyes you were wonderful and beautiful, and precious. god truly blessed me when he gave me you and I knew that even though I didn't act like it. I sincerely apologize for everything I've put you through over the years. You've been nothing but good to me and I didn't deserve it. I wish I could open my chest and show you how much I love/loved you but I can't. All you had were my actions and that wasn't much to go on and that's the part that hurts the most, to love someone so much but have no evidence (or very little) to show for it, to know that when someone you love remembers you all they can remember is pain and suffering rather than the love that you truly felt for them. I mean, I had my good moments but they are so far and between. You loved me unconditionally and consistently and I didn't give you the same in return. It isn't failing at marriage that hurts so much, it's the fact that I've failed you. You were my everything though I lacked in showing it. The fact that there may be someone out there that can love you better and make you happier is a very bitter pill to swallow. I don't know where this road is gonna take us but wherever it does just know that you are and always will be the love of my life and that you were the greatest thing to happen to me (though I didn't show it). Married or not, you are my soul mate and my best friend. Please don't respond. This is just something I thought you needed to know.
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What do you all think? What do I do with this?
Me: 33, H: 32 M: 12 years T: 13 years No kids D-Day: 7/2009 Separated: 10/12/10 Future Unknown GITS
"There's a fire starting in my heart, reaching a fever pitch and it's bringing me out the dark." - Adele
