Hello Back Again. I guess i will be frequenting this board more in the next while for your insights and self therapy - but in other forum sections.
Over a decade A DECADE in the making and it appears to be FINAL. Over ten years of unhappiness, trying to work it out, me carrying the load on many things....all for naught (but for my daughters at least which is worth it all).
Just after Christmas my wife asked me for a separation and divorce, in writing of course since she has great trouble communicating anything verbally. On top of the household being sick with a cold/flu all xmas vacation i had to struggle through dealing with this. Not merry.
She appeared to have it planned or on schedule and the revelation just before christmas that her small sis had gotten a suprise divorce from her 'dream' husband (not so dreamy now) really set the tone. W had counselling same week and came back happy with resolve. One more written letter indicating her resolve to move on and so it goes...
So it will be an in-house separation, separate sleeping arrangements, until some financial issues are worked out by late summer. We will downsize by then, sell what is not needed or suplus, fix the house for sale and be done. The talk right now is that the kids will live where they want to and sharing arrangements will be flexible. I think my W is sincere in this but will discuss this with the kids myself.
As to what i'm feeling? Turmoil. Mixed emotions, from frustration and some anger, regret to hope. Living with unhappiness and feeling futile for so long is no way to live. I see that. I have done my crying and self pity over the years and there is none left. I am done with her and must move on.
Just wanted to end this thread and move to other forum sections since its obvious i'm not a newcomer in any sense of the word.
Word of caution to genuine newcomers who read my saga. You can be optimistic but be realistic. Most times things are beyond your control or grasp. If a partner truly doesn't want you then at some point you can't fight it. Take care of your well being and realize you are important to somebody, always.
