Deju vu, but new to the online forum...round 2

[Denver_2010]

it's been over 3 months and all I do is fight, fight, and fight with him because he doesn't miss us and I miss him. I don't have as much opportunities where

I haven’t read all your posts and am not sure if there is a A or not but when my husband moved out he become more attached to the OW.

Just my 2 cents...

Sara - I just had to respond to your post here. I have not read your thread bc I have not seen it. Anyway, my W and I are physically separated and there is OM in my sitch too. I'm not sure status of R bw W and OM, was EA when she left, may be PA now, may be over now, I don't ask. Point is, I am trying to be the better choice for W now. You are right that it is very difficult with the physical separation, but how could you continue to live in same home as S knowing of ongoing A? I don't know that I could. But as I've learned, we never know just how we will react until we are in a particular situation.

Anyway, your comment that all you do with H is fight, fight, fight concerns me. Stop fighting with H about missing you. Why would he miss you if you continue to fight with him??? That is pressure and pursuit of the worst kind IMO. I guarantee you that he will not see you as better option with the continued arguing. Be the better woman and better option. I read on here that pushing S closer to OP is sometimes better bc it takes the A out of the realm of fantasy and into reality. Some have said that this is a necessary step for A to burn out. Curious on opinions about this?

Either way, there is NOTHING that you can do or say that is going to change your Hs actions right now. You can argue until you are blue in the face! He is living a fantasy right now and isn't going to change his choices until he begins to miss you and see you as the better option for his life. JMO